POTATO ACTIVITY ADVISORY

NOTICE TO THE PUBLIC

Recent reports indicate an increase in unusual potato gatherings and suspicious root vegetable behavior. Our Potato Intelligence Division (PID) relies on vigilant citizens like you to maintain tuber security.

WHAT TO WATCH FOR

Potatoes meeting in groups larger than recommended by local ordinances
Unexplained potato movement after hours
Unusual potato-to-potato communications
Potatoes disguising themselves as other vegetables
Unauthorized wifi signals emanating from potato bins
Root vegetables exhibiting non-standard behavior

See Something

Do Something

SAY SOMETHING

DATE OF INCIDENT

YYYY

TIME OF INCIDENT

Hour

Minute

Second

LOCATION

ACTIVITY DESCRIPTION

POTATO VARIETY INVOLVED

NUMBER OF POTATOES INVOLVED

WITNESS INFORMATION

First Name

Last Name

All reports are processed by our specialized Potato Intelligence Division. Your identity will be protected.
Do not attempt to intervene directly with suspicious potatoes.